Imagine, if.

I rip and tear so get the hell out of here.

Monday, June 04, 2007 @ 8:34 PM

Tell Me Whats There Left To do ('cause i will surely do it)

Haven't been updating much these days.
Not because i'm lazy, its because i've been working my ass off for more buckeroos to roll into my wallet.

Only need to work for 4 days and i already have a list of complaint about this damn job.
I have to stand for 9 whole hours and can only squat for 5 bleedy seconds if i can't tahan anymore.
Lunch at 3 or 4pm la.(Normally i will have it at 12)
Dinner is at an unearthly hour la, my latest was 9 plus 10.
Those buyers start coming in at 8 plus when it closes at 9.
Stupid shitts.

Caught a sore throat from Zhu.
And its a killer.
Fucking pain la, and had a slight fever but all was well on the third day.
Oh well, i'm glad that i survived this. (hooray!)

Alright, let's go random now.

To you.
I don't know what in the world were you thinking when you said those words to me.
Were the words that came out of your mouth so easily, true?
Were those lil things that you did purposely made me think about you every single shitt minute?
Why in the hell did you tell me those stuff that bloody night when i was about to leave it all behind?
And the best thing is that, you were attached when you said/did those stuff to me.

I've to admit that i was damn blinded that i couldn't think straight.
By right, i shouldn't get too close and you shouldn't do whatever you did to make me fall for you.
Gawd, if only i was clear headed at that point of time.
I could have seen that you were just fooling and playing around, in short, flirting around.

A particular someone hit the jackpot.
I could have been just other one of your stupid victim or probably the first.
You should know it yourself.
Anyway, you stand to gain and never lose anything.
So i guess your attitude would be, "why not?" right?

By saying all this here,
I know that i will lose whatever i once shared with you.
I will lose that feeling and memories.
And of cos, this friendship.
But since i've said all this here, i ain't gonna care about those feelings or memories.
They are most probably fakes.
All those memories which i treasured like mad were most probably build upon pretends, a fantasy you created for me.
So why would i treasure something which doesn't have truth in it, you tell me.

If you happen to read this by chance,
Well, i'm not sorry that i've said all this.
You didn't even care about my feelings in the first place so why should i care about yours now?
I did rush down after a long day work from suntec all the way down just so you don't have to wait long.
But think, did you even say anything comforting?
Hell no!
Instead you blame me cause i came quite late.
So this is what i get for rushing down,
Damn, why did i fall for someone like you?

If you wanna know if you were successful in screwing up my heart, i must say you did.,
You did well, well enough that i couldn't see light when you told me those bullshits stuff.
-clap clap.
Someone broke down that fantasy i was living in, believing in all those crap that you dump to me.
I've finally realised what you are, its so different from what i thought you are.
Its such a disappointment when i realised it.
Ah, screw you!
For making me feel like a fucktart all this while.
For making me fall for you.
And, for making me look like a fool in your eyes.

I have nothing much to say about those days now.
Its just an empty void with no feelings.
This is the last night i will bid you goodbye with tears in my eyes.
Now, i will get my peace forever.
Goodbye to last year.
And lastly, goodbye to you..

I was behind you all this while,
in your background but you didn't realise it.